As one can imagine whenever a person has a life changing event happen to them it throws their whole world upside down. Life as they knew it no longer exists. Suddenly the person goes from their well established comfortable known routines to a world in which they feel like they know very little. Welcome to my world.
I post alot on Facebook. Mostly about my little triumphs and I get lots of encouragement from my friends telling me that I am doing great which makes me feel good. Sadly, the truth is that I don’t post too much about the times I am laying in bed or sitting on the edge of the bed doubting myself and my ability to work through this whole amputation thing. My life right now is a life of high peaks and low valleys.
On the one hand I have been able to get out of bed, go to the bathroom, made my own coffee, move about the house and get out of the house. This is great stuff for someone with one leg and no prosthetic yet.
On the other hand and at the same time there’s much more to learn and I also need to build up my strength and I sometimes doubt I can. I also worry about my wife Sharon. I may be the amputee but she is my caretaker and it’s alot of work especially for someone who had three spinal fusion and multiple other back surgeries. I worry about her and the toll it may take on her constantly. I also worry about money and the lack thereof. All these things make me doubt myself and my ability to heal and live a normal life. If I’m worried about a million little things how much time is that taking away from me focusing on my recovery?
The peaks and valleys of my life are very real. I’m just hoping for more peaks than valleys.